How does it feel when you lose something u owned since 22 years? Down, broken, maybe even crying like a kid. That’s exactly what I am close to. I have lost my leanness :( I have been thin and lean since my childhood, all the desperate efforts of my entire family tree failed badly to raise the girth around my tummy. I wasn’t satisfied, I used to make fun of people who used to worry about getting fat and today I realise what it means to feel fat :( to be fat is a simpler feeling but feeling fat is something really different and its not enjoyable :)
There are lot of important things that I lost and I made a long mourning for few, some of them worth a laugh and some of them really bad - as if a child had lost its mother. I felt the world to be unjust, horrible place to live in;
thankfully I am not having the same feeling for losing my image of agreeableness. I say no to people quite easily now and for lot of things, I persuade people to do lot of things and that’s something new.
I don’t know whether I approve of this newness or I miss my old self, but I am not feeling guilty and that’s worth a mention.
One change I really regret is the fact that in spite of having a bundle of chocolates and big bars of chocolate lying at my disposal, I am not able to eat it, not out of any other reason but just because I don’t remember to eat it at correct time. Now this part of change is called dissonance, I m doing something which I don’t want to do and its out of compulsion.
One change I really detest is that I have forgotten to give gifts to people, some of my good friend’s birthdays just passed and I couldn’t get a gift or even a small card for them. This part of change I really detest. I hope to change it soon. To all my friends who have had a share of this behaviour of mine, I am sorry..
Well, on the whole, the change has been a change, its not something which can be compared with past performance, but I will wait for future, for my time to come.
There are lot of important things that I lost and I made a long mourning for few, some of them worth a laugh and some of them really bad - as if a child had lost its mother. I felt the world to be unjust, horrible place to live in;
thankfully I am not having the same feeling for losing my image of agreeableness. I say no to people quite easily now and for lot of things, I persuade people to do lot of things and that’s something new.
I don’t know whether I approve of this newness or I miss my old self, but I am not feeling guilty and that’s worth a mention.
One change I really regret is the fact that in spite of having a bundle of chocolates and big bars of chocolate lying at my disposal, I am not able to eat it, not out of any other reason but just because I don’t remember to eat it at correct time. Now this part of change is called dissonance, I m doing something which I don’t want to do and its out of compulsion.
One change I really detest is that I have forgotten to give gifts to people, some of my good friend’s birthdays just passed and I couldn’t get a gift or even a small card for them. This part of change I really detest. I hope to change it soon. To all my friends who have had a share of this behaviour of mine, I am sorry..
Well, on the whole, the change has been a change, its not something which can be compared with past performance, but I will wait for future, for my time to come.
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